Celebrating… Not Really
When something you waited for finally arrives, and the joy doesn’t.
If you read my last article, you’ll know that I finally became an RTCc, short for Registered Therapeutic Counsellor candidate. Yes! At last! A designation that’s tangible: my clients can now get reimbursed by their extended health insurance, if they have one (which isn’t everybody, and is honestly a privilege), and that makes me more legitimate in the eyes of some people.
So. I’m supposed to be happy, to be celebrating.
And yet… there wasn’t much joy.
There was relief, yes, after waiting for six weeks, relief was enormous. But joy? Not quite. Partly because I quickly realized that not all extended health insurance plans actually recognize the RTCc designation, which means I’m still missing out on potential clients who want to use their benefits. I understand on their end. Still frustrating on mine.
It’s a bit like finally turning 16 and getting your driver’s license, but still having to drive with an experienced driver in the passenger seat. The freedom you imagined isn’t quite there yet. One more step still to go.
And then July happened.
Without going into too much detail, I went through a really difficult time in July until early August. Nothing really big occurred on the outside, except the long wait for my registration. But something old and deep surfaced from within, an old belief that had been quietly waiting for the right moment to come up. It shook me more than I expected…
And apparently, astrologically speaking, July 2026 was… a lot. If you follow that kind of thing, you might know about it. I’m no astrology expert, but something did feel different. Heavier. Like old things were being pushed to the surface. When I talked to some friends, it seemed like I wasn’t alone in feeling this way. I’m still making sense of my experience.
All of that: the difficult inner work, the astrological intensity, the emotional weight of July, overshadowed what should have been a moment of celebration. The RTCc arrived in the middle of the storm. And storms have a way of taking over good news. Survival first, again!
Sometimes we’re supposed to be celebrating something, but life doesn’t pause to let us. Other things are happening at the same time. Or the thing we worked so hard for turns out to be less complete than we hoped. Or the joy we expected just… doesn’t show up the way we imagined it would.
There’s actually a name for this gap, the difference between what we think will make us happy and how we actually feel when it arrives. Psychologists call it the “impact bias”: we consistently overestimate how good or bad something will make us feel, and for how long. Our imagination of how things will feel is always more dramatic than the reality. That’s not a personal failing. It’s just how humans work.
In my case, it seems like there will need to be a few more steps before I can feel truly content with where I am. And I’m learning to be okay with that. One step at a time.
There’s always something else to do, always another milestone further down the road. But today, 8 days after receiving those “letters” after my name, I’m choosing to simply be content with what I have. To keep going. To keep asking myself whether I really want this, and answering yes. Yes, I want to be a counsellor. A good one. A kind, empathic, grounded one, who can hold space for people and offer real, practical support.
And as I write this, I can feel a small opening, a little space where something that might be pride is quietly showing up. Pride for the journey. For the ups and the downs. For still being here, still going, even when it was hard. Even when the joy didn’t come when it was supposed to.
I’ve come a long way. And look at where I am now!
And as Rick Hanson says: let’s soak that in for at least 20 seconds. 🤍
🌱 If you’re struggling with your mental and emotional health, you’re not alone. I’m offering counselling sessions as an RTCc, and I’d be honoured to support you on your path. Reach out anytime 🙂 Contact me
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